Day 44.5: Still Raw...

...just like my veggies.

So, yeah. Quite the emotional upheaval earlier. The thing that made it possible for me to carry on with my day was, literally, blogging it out and knowing, even before anyone responded, that you would all understand and not think I was bat-shit insane. So, thanks for that and also for your words of wisdom. They really did help. I do feel moderately better.

I guess I could sense it building, this anxiety around moving my PCP-ified life out to the island. Which is, of course, kinda nutballs since Fire Island is the happiest place on earth, a place of few cares and no worries. We're lucky ducks to be able to be there for so long and I really am excited to finally get there - and, to be with our friends! And yet, those lingering worries about how to navigate the PCP out there just came to an ugly, ugly head this AM.

I know I'll get thru this phase - I'm not truly considering throwing in the towel. I want to get to the sage-like hard-body stage that Team Sexaaaay is rockin'! For now, though, all I can do is muddle through one day at a time.

Not so much looking forward to tomorrow's workout, since most likely I won't have time in the morning to do it at home before we leave. But I *will* get to wear my new workout gloves (thx for the suggestion, Haley). Which will hopefully prevent more of this from happening:
Wait, what? You're wondering why I'm flipping the...OH! I see it now! So sorry, didn't mean to offend. I just wanted to show you my bruised middle finger. Yep, whipped by my new rope. But, now that you mention it, a f*$# you feels kinda cathartic.

YES I will have internet access at the beach - holy hell, I think I'd be even farther over the edge if I had to unplug from everyone's blogs for that long. Y'all keep me going. So, more updates forthcoming fer sure.